Dear People Who Actually Read this Blog,
I’ve recently realized that I should never say never. Allow me to illustrate how I came to this conclusion. We just have to rewind my life to about a year ago.
One Year Ago- A pregnant Jennie was just beginning to transition from that awkward stage where people are wondering if you should stop asking for second helpings to that phase where you are officially out of the pregnant closet. I could strut, without a hint of the waddle soon to come, around Buy Buy Baby looking at items my darling fetus would soon need. I passed this bizarre contraption called “Nosefrida: The Snotsucker Nasal Aspirator.” For anyone who is unfamiliar, this Swedish device is essentially a tube attached to a straw. You are supposed to put the tube up your kid’s nose and siphon out the snot with your mouth. I wrinkled my brow and curled up my lip. Gross. I vowed I would never use such a thing. Ever. It was foul.
Fast forward to May when Vince got his first stuffy nose. The lame-o plastic squeezer aspirator in my baby first aid kit barely got a single booger. It only took one little wheeze from my little man before I was high tailing it to the store and snatched up the first Snotsucker I could find. Vince was wailing, but I sucked that snot like I was slurping up a milkshake. (Don’t worry, it has a little filter thing so that boogies never go anywhere near your mouth.) It cleared those nasal passages. Mucus-0 Mom-1
You’d think I’d learned my lesson about never saying never, but just a week after the Snotsucker incident I was walking around Target with Vince in his Baby Bjorn. Vince had developed a strong preference for Nuk pacifiers, and those darn things have a penchant for vanishing. “Oh dear, “ I said to myself. (At least I think it was to myself, but at this point in my post partum I had lost the ability to distinguish from inner and outer monologue. FYI: I’m still waiting for this ability to return.) “This is the wrong size. It is for 6+ month olds. We’ll never need that because the paper the doctor gave us says that babies should stop using pacifiers between 4-6 months.” I placed it back on the rack; so confident I would never require this larger size-soothing device. Once again, what a dope! Every time he goes to sleep Vince is sucking strong at almost seven months. No sign of weaning in sight. But did I learn my lesson?
Fast forward to September, when I publicly declared on this blog that I would post every week. A calm and confident Jennie typed those words. A frazzled and wiser Jennie is now admitting to her folly. What was I thinking? Once teaching got going, grad school reading kicked in, and Vince starting being so ridiculously fun it seems that my days somehow have less hours in them. There is simply no way I can hold onto my once a week promise. I’m sorry. You live and learn. I shouldn’t make definitive statements, because then I inevitably end up being liar. I mostly lie to myself, but in this case I have lied to everyone who reads this blog. I apologize.
I’d say I’d never do it again, but…we all now how that goes.